Another One Bites the Bust

I have nursed all my kids and at one point in time or another all of them have bitten me. It's normally resolved when a.) I jump in pain, b.) in a stern voice I say "No biting!" and c.) they cry because I've never spoken so harshly. This however is not the case with Vance. Sure he's startled when I jump two feet as his teeth clamp down on my nipple. Yes, he looks like I just killed the dog in front of him as his bottom lip sticks out and he begins to cry. Yet after he latches back on, he is biting again within 30 seconds. This behavior has made me contemplate weaning him, something I've never done since all of my kids have weaned themselves.

I would like people to believe that I nurse and have nursed my children because it is so great for their development and that it makes them healthier and smarter. Actually those were my reasons for Jace, however once I realized the benefits it afforded me, my motivation was selfish. I am a lazy mom. I hate to wake in the night. I hate to wash dishes. I always forget to restock the diaper bag. I don't like to exercise. So when I realized that I could just pull the baby in bed with me to feed and sleep at the same time, I became a fan. The fact that there were no bottles to wash, made me never regret the decision. I was grateful that even though I may have forgotten the pacifier and baby toys, I could always nurse the kid quiet. The way the pounds would drop off me like leaves in the fall made me practically an advocate for breastfeeding. Now there is Vance, making me question my nursing choices, and apply salve to my bruised nips.

So what's a mom to do? Even before the economy took a dump I refused to pay $20 for a can of formula. I could pump, but then there is the time involved with standing in the bedroom with my equipment for 20 minutes three times a day. A whole hour a day, where the little ones run a muck while I shout at them from behind closed doors for what they are doing or about to do - sounds like a bad idea to me. So then I heard that goat's milk is the closest milk to human milk and could be given to infants. Evidently the milk is healthier than cow's milk and would be beneficial to the whole family. My interest was piqued. I began the research, thinking I could buy a nanny and save us a whole lot of money, since we go through 4 gallons of milk a week. Although I had never had a milking goat the memories of raising sheep made me a bit giddy inside. I approached Brian with my request, and in typical Brian style he never gave me a diffinitive answer. I took this as a yes and began searching Craig's list and furthering my goat-milking research. I found the momma goat and her baby for $100, that equals around 20 gallons of milk, five weeks of milk buying.

Then like all my great plans they started to crumble around me. A friend of mine told me goat milk doesn't taste anything like a cow's milk and tastes rather gross. I heard I'd have to milk twice a day and the amount varies as does the time from a quarter to a half gallon of milk in anywhere from 5 to 30 minutes. That barely covers our breakfast. My hopes were being dashed. I was beginning to think if I won't milk myself, why would I want to purchase a goat and milk it. I'd have another mouth to feed, have more poop to clean up after, and have to buy food for every other week. I've decided that I am going to tough it out, literally, or I am going to break down and pump. After all my mom always said, "Why buy the goat, when you can get the milk for free?" Actually she said "cow" and used it in a different context, but the point remains true.