Birthdays. The older I get the closer they seem to come. For the past two years I have used the opportunity of aging to write about what I've become and what I want to change. This year after reading Annette's birthday post I decided to do 35 wishes to commemorate the big 3-5.
The candles are glowing on a less-than-perfect, perfect birthday cake. The heat from 35 candles is more than I had anticipated. And as I take a breath in these are my wishes:
1. I wish that the bath tub no longer acted like an enema on Sadie. Every. Time. (Nothing ruins a morning like a turd in the tub.)
2. I wish I had a camera. Not a huge, I'm-a-photographer- and-should-probably-be-wearing-back-support-to-carry-it camera, but a fun-colored-rechargeable-number-I-can-throw-in-my-purse-and-turn-out-better-than-a-cell-phone-picture camera.
3. I wish that my boobs protruded off my body farther than my stomach.
4. I wish that the kids would listen...and obey!
5. I wish that I had the confidence and repertoire of a porn star.
6. I wish I could be consistent with the hundreds of chore charts and punishment plans I've created over the years and could have at least have one that is operational in my life.
7. I wish I saw myself as 35 instead of 19. I think if I truly embraced my age I would speak and act with more authority. It also wouldn't be as big of a shock when I find new wrinkles or rogue hairs sprouting from places I didn't have a hair the day before.
8. I wish my bladder was bigger and able to hold enough urine to make it through til the morning.
9. I wish I didn't spend so much time on Facebook. (Cursed time sucker!)
10. I wish someone would send Clinton and Stacy from What Not to Wear my way so I could be more fashionable or I would settle for a cute pair of jeans that didn't show my crack every time I sat down.
11. I wish I got more sleep, had more energy, or liked the taste of 5-Hour Energy drinks.
12. I wish I could contribute financially to our family.
13. I wish God would increase my desire for His Word and that my love for the Lord would drive my actions and my words.
14. I wish I wasn't so lazy. That I had an overwhelming desire to organize and clean, instead of sleep, watch T.V., and eat. (Okay...and check people's statuses.)
15. I wish to travel to Borneo and hold baby orangutans.
16. I wish God's plan and direction for our family would be obvious.
17. I wish I would write more. I love to do it, but sometimes (most times) I lack creative thoughts. My fear of criticism is pretty great too, so please be nice.
18. I wish I knew the answer to the million dollar question, "Are you done, yet?" I truly don't know. I think we are until ovulation clouds all good judgment and then my desire for another grows...then Vance tantrums and "pouf" it's gone.
19. I wish I had a house cleaner. Not every day. Once a week would be outstanding. I could even, be ecstatic with every other week...or once a month...or a once a year. Heck, one day of my life to walk into my home and see it completely clean would be amazing.
20. I wish homeschooling was easy and that the decision to do it/continue doing it was even easier to reach.
21. I wish our family could move to the east coast and open up an adventure family lodge or that we could at least visit our extended family on an annual basis.
22. I wish I baked more and ate less.
23. I wish that the last line of Charlotte's Web could one day be said about me, "It is not often someone comes along that's a true friend and a good writer. Charlotte was both."
24. I wish I gave more and expected less.
25. I wish to win the lottery without playing the lottery or a large windfall without visiting Vegas.
26. I wish that my desire to teach and affect youth would start with my own children.
27. I wish I would realize time is not my own, but that I would still be able to get a little time for myself even if that means going to the bathroom without children banging on the wall or kicking the door.
28. I wish that I would parent Jace and Brynna and their "Do-you-feel-my-gravitational-pull-because-the-world-revolves-around-me" attitude in a healthy manner and wouldn't get pulled into the "I-really-want-you-to-like-me" parenting style.
29. I wish I would be grateful for the things I take for granted, a house, a vehicle, a pantry with food, and a husband who can fix almost everything. Speaking of which...
30. I wish Brian and I would continue to fall more in love as the years go on (16 years so far...Yay!).
31. I wish I overlooked the mess of life and a desert backyard in need of a pergola and a patio and invited people over more.
32. I wish for health over my family and friends.
33. I wish for a haircut, pedicure, eyebrow waxing, and a massage. I'm looking and feeling a little rough.
34. I wish for chickens and a coop. I have romanticized farm fresh eggs for so long, I'm sure it will be disappointing and more work than I would like, but I want to find out for myself.
35. I wish for at least 35 more birthdays.